Thinking wives are high maintenance. Though, not in a superficial, materialistic sort of way. More so, in the psychological and emotional arena. As a thinking wife myself, I felt it would only be fair to give fair warning as to what marriage may entail if you choose a thinker. Thinking women come with our own set of challenging traits.
Not sure if your woman of interest is a thinker? If she asks you what your life’s plan is, even before you begin to date, she may be a thinker. Museums, art festivals, deep conversations, and traveling may make up the majority, or all your dates. She will enjoy discussing politics, religion, and all things not to be discussed at a dinner party. She will read philosophy text books as if they were written by Dr. Seuss, just for fun, because thinking is fun! She will be entertained by learning and new experiences. New ideas, places, foods, and adventures are her life blood.
She will ask you what YOU are thinking at random with the expectation that you will respond thoughtfully and honestly. Before she asks, she will have judged your facial expressions and predetermined that you are indeed thinking something deeply profound. You may or may not disappoint her when you inform of your thoughts, or the lack there of. It doesn’t end here. She is an asker with an insatiable hunger for truth and knowledge. There’s no intent to offend, but rather to gain insight. She will ask existential questions out of insecurity and/or curiosity. She will thrive on engaging conversations that enlighten and connect. You needn’t take her questions personally. It’s all merely her train of thought.
While enjoying listening to music together, she will bring your attention to the lyrics of the song playing. She may strongly suggest that you listen to the words and notice how they relate to the harmonies. She will then spew out how the song affects her on every transcendent level. Thus, killing any previous enjoyment for the song you once had.
She listens to NPR, or the talk radio of her choice, on road trips. As if that wasn’t enough, she often attempts to discuss the current reporting, Terry Gross interviews, as well as various other fascinating reports. You become drowsy with boredom. You struggle to stay alert enough to navigate the winding country roads. You are certain this will be how you die. She continues to drone on and on; seemingly unaware of the torture she is inflicting upon you.
Your thinking wife will require continuous reassurance of your love and satisfaction, because she’s aware of how the world and individuals are ever changing. Her heightened senses tell her that nothing remains the same. She knows each entity is in a constant state of growth, death, or simple entropy.
She will begin to write or paint at the most inopportune times simply because she must. She has learned that when creativity attacks, it demands to be exercised. It doesn’t matter that there are chores to be done or places to go. She will stop and rip everything to create.
She questions even herself daily. Managing her security may start to feel burdensome. She needs you to listen to her as she processes her day, thinks through a creative endeavor, or wonders about her dreams. She will be her own worst enemy, critiquing her every flaw and mistake. She may become paralyzed by self-doubt and fear. When her world turns cold and unkind, she will turn to you in hopes that you are her anchor and guiding hand. She will look to rest in your arms. If you welcome her, listen, and hold her, it will bring a deeply satisfying peace and comfort to her heart. Just remember she is stronger than she appears. Be careful to not underestimate her. Remain steady and she will find her balance. Give her a place to fall, and she will rise.
As much as she needs to wonder and dream, she needs rest due to her exhaustive thought patterns. It’s a heavy weight she carries, constantly thinking and processing herself and those around her. Downtime is a precious necessity. Allowing it will only serve you.
Her intuition is magically accurate. She will see things differently than most; with more clarity and intensity. You may make the mistake of doubting her senses in the beginning. She will be sure to remind you later of your errors. Save your time, she’s always right about the big stuff.
She will give you her word, her heart, and being wholly with intention and trust.
She will write you love poems and text them to you throughout your day.
She will require a partner to join her for, at least some of, her imaginary and real adventures. She needs someone constant and true, in a world that is anything but, to be her steady.
She will laugh with her whole being and her cry will release the depths of her soul.
She will love you with intensity and purity unknown to you before meeting her.
She knows what she is asking of you. She has placed faith in you, that you are up to the task. She will know you better than you know yourself. She will see your best in you when you can’t. She will hope that you share the same ability. And when you struggle with her, she will understand when it becomes too much. She will believe in “you,” as a partnership, that when connected, is invisible. This why she chose you. She will be no less, and probably even more for you, when you need it all back in return.
So be warned. Ask yourself if you are up to challenge. Are you strong enough to rest your ego from time to time? Are you secure enough in yourself to lend your heart to the woman you love? Are you willing to travel to and from the extreme highs and lows with a woman who feels so deeply, who notices this abounding, beautifully messy life? If you are ever so lucky to find yourself in the presence of a thinking woman, this may be your future. Run, don’t walk into her life. Cast away any facades; no shield, no walls. Put forth your genuine interest and buckle up. Get ready for whatever may come. It may just be the best, most interesting, life changing experience that will come your way.