Have you ever prayed a half prayer? You know, when your heart whispers it, and your mind only kind of thinks it. You hope God is listening, but maybe not fully. Maybe, you’re afraid to ask. Maybe, you think He is too busy with much more important and pressing concerns such as global warming, political strife, and poverty, to name a few. Maybe even, you think it’s silly. Still, something inside you whispers to the Heavens.
This is exactly what I did yesterday afternoon. I had one of those ‘terrible, horrible, no-good very bad days.’* It had me feeling betrayed, disappointed, and disheartened. I was questioning myself, my purpose, lifestyle, and direction. Once again, I felt lost and could feel myself breaking. On my way home, I half-prayed for a change. I had a phone call planned for later on in the evening with someone who I’ve been admiring. While I simultaneously thought about our upcoming conversation and desperately searched my soul, my heart cried out for help, my mind cowered in fear, yet something in me whispered for some help. Quietly my spirit sent the message asking for a door of change to open, if only just a crack. Any forward movement would be appreciated. I was just craving for something to affirm whatever this is that’s pulling my heart. Once home, I cried and ate chocolate. I felt a little better.
The time came for the phone call. I was nervous and still hurting from earlier. The conversation flowed effortlessly. It was helpful and insightful. Bekah Jane Pogue was kind and knowledgeable, just as I imagined her. I was open, in order to take in all of her advice. After we hung up, the words and the ideas we shared began to penetrate. I love a conversation that makes you think long after the talking has stopped. And then I knew. He hears even the whispers. The words, “He hears even the whispers,” echoed. Almost unbelievably my whispers had been answered with compassion and kindness. From my little whisper-prayer came inspiration, direction, and focus. The End. I went to bed.
Or, so I thought. The next morning, I woke. Social media addiction led me to check in. I found Bekah’s most recent blog enrty. I read about how she is struggling just as I am. She’s just as scared and unsure of all the changes in her life. Life has her in such a similar grasp, as it does me. She, too, is searching for purpose, security, and guidance. She is unaware that she is fulfilling her purpose, as she understands it to be. I read her words, “Life from death. Breath from bone,” based on Ezekiel 37:4-6. Unknown to her, that is exactly what she gave me in a moment when I needed it most. After I hung up from our talk, I felt relief. I felt space in my heart to keep going.
God heard each of us in our own, unique voice exactly where we were, and proceeded to work his Holy magic. He hears whispers and shouts.
*Quote from the book, “Alexander and the Terrible, Horrible, No Good, Very Bad Day.” Author, Judith Voirst
*Blog post by Bekah Jane Pogue can be found here.